Sunday Times E-Paper

An example of honest and integrated living

Duleep de Chickera

In his last conversation with me, Trevor’s gentle words sounded like a confession. He had turned down an award for excellence in his profession, as he felt it would create a conflict of loyalties. His membership and first loyalty was with an older organization.

Months earlier he had turned down the offer of a COVID vaccine, because he did not belong to the group for whom it was being administered.

This was the man who became my brother when Crystal and Gihan married. Gentle and full of integrity, Trevor was a calm and clean influence with one and all. Exceptionally well informed on current affairs, he had a lucid way of explaining social trends and challenges and the courage to then state his own position.

Trevor cherished his girls Crystal and Andrea till the end. Nothing brought him greater joy than to observe them grow into women of integrity. Talking about them, his smile seemed to say, “This is all I want”.

When his dear Andrea passed away in the prime of life, a substantial part of

Trevor died. But, even though tears and sadness refused to go away, the memory of the young woman she had become, made his tomorrow a bit more possible. Exceptionally integrated and attractive, and academically and professionally accomplished, the memories of Andrea in life, seemed to slowly provide the solace and strength for Trevor to go on with his own life.

Trevor and his life’s partner Geraldine, made a warm and generous couple. Their lovely home at Ampitiya was always open to friends and relations, with the characteristic invitation to stay on for a few days. Those who accepted had the additional company of Tango, Scrappy and Brownie. The Baines family were dog lovers and there was no discrimination between all living beings under their roof. This was also true of the vulnerable who called at their door. They were not simply helped, they were received with respect and dignity.

The relationship between Trevor and Geraldine was typical of an unpretentious marriage.

There was always room for difference of opinion, built on a foundation of years of love and care. This was most noticeable the way Trevor would close their friendly banter by allowing his Gero to think she had had the last word. His gentle smile and knowing nod implied that this was a familiar practice to them both.

Whenever we visited, Trevor insisted on doing the sandwiches for our return trip to Colombo. The way he sliced the vegetables and spread the egg, it was clear that the unforgettable flavour in the food came mostly from the method and mentality of the master chef that he was. Anyone could mix ingredients.

As a master chef with decades of experience in the country and the world,

Trevor refused to conceal his culinary secrets. Recklessly generous with his recipes and expertise, he was loved and respected by the chef fraternity. Across the generations, those who benefited from his mentoring, rose to shine in the world of cuisine and hospitality all over the country and globe.

Right up to his last days, Trevor was in demand as a management consultant. When new hotels and restaurants were being set up, or existing ones ran into difficulty, those who knew him or about him, turned to him. Money mattered least, and whether it came or not, he remained liberal with his prowess and expertise.

One of the consultancies he greatly valued was the training of war widows in culinary skills and food outlet management. Communicating through a translator, and using the basic Tamil he knew, he worked hard to enter the trauma of the women—and from there led and encouraged them to discover their potential. Travelling regularly to Mankulam and back by bus, this was how he opened up a new life of economic security and dignity for his students. For those with eyes to see and ears to hear, under the skin of the world-class chef, there lay a humble and empathetic facilitator.

Crystal’s touching tribute assured her father that the liberating simplicity and integrity she valued, came from him, and would never be compromised. Many of those who listened, connected with this covenantal promise. All that we had received from Trevor would be lived out the way he did it, in loving memory of an outstanding human being.

Go well my brother and add your distinct flavour to the heavenly banquet.

APPRECIATIONS

en-lk

2021-10-17T07:00:00.0000000Z

2021-10-17T07:00:00.0000000Z

https://sundaytimes.pressreader.com/article/282458532148946

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